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Anxiety In Children - Is It Really That Big Of A Deal?

October 03, 20232 min read

The short answer - yes, it is. Regardless of in what form anxiety takes with its' outlets - physical, emotional, or verbal - an anxiety attack, panic attack, or other outward demonstrations of anxiety should always be treated seriously.

Sometimes, as parents and adults, that is hard. It is easy to forget that we as adults see things much differently than that of a child. What's key to remember here is the use of perspective. Kids, quite literally, see things differently; they only see from their own very limited experiences. They will then act accordingly.

Think of children struggling with anxiety as a horse with blinders. They have a very limited view, and can only see a few select things. The more tools and resources available, that a child or young adult knows how to use, the less restrictive the blinders, and the less panic that ensues from a blind reaction.

blindfolded horse

A child, teenager, or young adult often does not have the same tool kit of resources as an adult does, to be able to manage the situation that is causing anxiety. Hence, they may act out, and give others around them a reason to back away, either physically or emotionally. Unfortunately, that's often the worst outcome in the case of an anxiety-related issue.

Trying to manage chronic anxiety can get in the way of a lot, including extracurricular activities and academics in school. I was speaking about this to a good friend of mine this past week, on our podcast The Parents' Solution. She's been a CYC for 16+ years, and is a highly respected individual in academic circles. She had some tips she felt were a nicely packaged summary of helpful concepts from Dr. Clark Goldstein, of the Child Mind Institute:

1) The goal isn't to eliminate anxiety, but to help your child manage it.

2) Don't avoid things just because they make your child anxious.

3) Express positive and realistic expectations.

4) Respect their feelings, but don't empower them.

5) Don't ask leading questions,

6) Don't reinforce your child's fears.

7) Encourage your child to tolerate their anxiety.

8) Try to keep the anticipation period short.

9) Think things through with your child.

10) Model healthy ways of handling anxiety to your child.

All definitely easier said than done, as with most things. But with practice and patience, these tips become much more realistic than they first appear.

As I like to say, practice makes progress.

Involve children in their own journey, emotionally as well as physically. You'll be surprised how many eager and bright ideas they have, and how willing they are to make significant changes when they know you're in their corner rooting for them.

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Childhood AnxietyParenting TipsEmotional ManagementAnxiety ManagementChildren's PerspectiveAnxiety ManifestationParental UnderstandingEmotional JourneyAnxiety ChanllengesChild Mental Health
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Kimberly Gawne

Founder, Teacher, & Instructional Specialist Specializations: IB Curriculum (Arts & Language), High School Arts & Language, Elementary (K - 8) Kimberly is the proud owner of Star Students and has always been driven by her passion for people and learning. From her younger days of exploring and discovering new ways to do things, her love for learning and connecting with people evolved into a desire to share her enthusiasm, skills, and knowledge. Teaching, for Kimberly, is a harmonious blend of these worlds, offering a platform where both student and teacher can embark on a transformative learning journey together. Drawing inspiration from her own educational experiences, particularly the challenges she faced in math and the unwavering support from her father, Kimberly founded Star Students. Her father's adaptability to her unique learning style and his relentless efforts to ensure her understanding have been pivotal in shaping her vision for Star Students.

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Star Students worked with our son for approximately 8 months. The intention was to help him get through the last few months of school and the summer, bring him up to grade level with his reading and math skills, and improve his work habits. Our son was showing a lack of enthusiasm for school, making it difficult for him to focus, and his frustration was evident when he needed to stretch himself to learn new things. It was also very important to us that he develop confidence in himself and his abilities, and this is where Star Students came in.

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